I've connected with several participants by this time. And I realized, wow, I do love them all! Even the irritable ones. Even the ones who complained and questioned. My whole theory about being an endless source of love was being put into practice. And it worked. I related with compassion. And they showed their gratitude back. And I felt blessed that a couple of participants felt so comfortable with me that they shared some deep emotional experiences. Tears flowed. There was sadness about family members who are ill. There was a feeling of hope and relief about personal physical difficulties. And I felt love for all of them. So after all these years, a retired New York Actress, armed with the walls that have protected her for so long, learns to love. And finds peace.

Monday, July 19 4:45pm NINE BREATH CIRCLE

As we were sending energy of love, peace, and forgiveness to the world, one word kept popping into my head. ALLOWING. Allow love to drift in and out of your life, Allow peace to manifest itself in both big and small ways. Allow others their mistakes and the lessons they will ultimately learn from them, for allowing is the ultimate form of forgiving. And I forgave others as I forgave myself. And I made peace.

Monday, July 12, 2010

ON RELATIONSHIPS

I don't know about you, but I've had a really busy couple of days. My boys from Holland had troubles keeping their cleats off people's chests, I was so busy promoting the San Diego Qi Revolution, preparing for our upcoming Artwalk on July 23rd, and now the Total Solar Eclipse in the New Moon! Whew! What better time to procrastinate by re-evaluating the nature of relationships? Inspired by the Flower of Life graphic on the Qi Revolution fliers, I started a close examination of the different types of relationships we all have in our lives.

1. THIS IS US. Yes, believe it or not, this circle represents us... in a very abstract, minimalist sort of sense. As noted, the tiny dot represents our spirit, from where our truth comes, and is housed in our heart. You know, when you have a "heart-to-heart," it normally means that you will be expressing your deepest truth, right?

During our day-to-day living, we express truths from our hearts (or intend to, anyway) in the way we view the world, what we feel, who or what excites us, who or what fuels our curiosity, etc. These are all ways that our spirit is trying to manifest itself in our external world. Got it? Good.

2. THESE ARE OUR ACQUAINTANCES. They may be people with whom we work, study, or live near. Estranged family may also fall into this category, as well as friends of friends, where one set of circumstances brought both your external selves together. This is our most abundant relationship, one that we create hundreds of times throughout our days. All relationships go through this phase of initial contact.

3. THESE ARE OUR FRIENDS. While still holding our spirits separate from these relationships, these become very valuable to our emotional well-being. It is important for all of us to feel understood, to be heard, to feel like we belong in a community of people. These connections feed that, because you not only go to the same school, you may also like the same subjects, you may have traveled to the same places, or you may even be living in the same part of town! Throughout the course of your lifetime, you will probably develop hundreds of these friends.

4. THESE ARE OUR LOVED ONES. The connections we have that moves through our spirit is the strongest of bonds. Not only are there connections between our external manifestations, our external manifestations also reach the other person's heart. And by the virtue of sacred geometry, when you fully reach someone's heart, it means that they've fully reached yours. These connections, although a bit more rare, is what truly nourishes you on a spirit level, because you not only share experiences and interests, you share a common feeling of love. These not only have to be romantic love, it can be the love felt by parents towards their children, it can be very close family members, it may even be your best friendships.

Much like the movement of the atoms in our bodies, these relationships are in constant flux, moving toward and away (Qigong practitioners, does that sound familiar?). The key is recognizing and accepting the current state of your relationships, and knowing that they happen because: a.) to help you on your journey, b.) teach you a lesson, or c.) to reflect something back to you about your own self.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

ON FREEDOM

This time of the year always makes me think about freedom (I wonder why... hee hee hee). Toaist philosophy and scientific laws of nature say that everything exists through and with its opposite; so of course thinking of freedom brings me to thoughts about the things that cause me to feel enslaved or entrapped. I've realized that there are so many ways that I lose my freedom, some of which I readily recognize as patterns in my life; and yet some almost just creep in unexpectedly. So below is a brief list of some of my unresourceful patterns and how I plan to break free from their chains:

1. FREEDOM FROM JUDGMENT THROUGH NON-JUDGMENT

This is a big one. Sometimes we don't even recognize judgment, masking it as "preference." Let's face it, everyone (yes, including me) makes a bad choice: clothes, partnerships, profession, words in a conversation, actions, etc. ad nauseum. And what seems like a bad choice for us may not be for another. The process of allowing someone to move through their own journey of learning from their mistakes is a gift. Treating someone with KIND, COMPASSIONATE ACCEPTANCE is the key. And that someone you may want to start with is you.

Meditation Exercise: Sit in a comfortable position in front of a mirror. Close your eyes and start breathing quietly into your belly, really focusing on when your breath touches your hear. Imagine absorbing a bright white light from the top of your head, then imagine this light pushing down any darkness lingering in your spirit down into the earth. Then slowly open your eyes, look at yourself in the mirror and marvel at your perfect humanity. Bringing all of your energetic awarenes into your heart, send love, and smile with acceptance of all the moments of your life.

Public exercise: Go to the nearest coffee shop (or your favorite people-watching spot) and sit down with a warm cup of tea and observe. Be aware of even the slightest hint of judgment of anyone (calling someone "superficial" is one of the tricky ones). Repeat the breath exercise from above, only this time, send the love to and smile with acceptance at any person for whom you bear any judgment.

2. FREEDOM FROM BOREDOM OF RESPONSIBILITY THROUGH INSPIRATION

Yes, there are times when I don't want to clean. Or write. Or times when all I want to do is stay at home and watch GLEE (see #1: non-judgment exercise). The best way to be motivated into action? BE INSPIRED! We are all surrounded by guides disguised as regular folk: when I visit my impeccable friend, Matt, for example, I'm always inspired to clean. When I'm fresh out of ideas for writing, I turn to the best part of my favorite book adn read a few pages. When I need motivation to work out or practice Qigong, I look at all the beautifully fit people around me, or visit www.qirevolution.com and see all my fellow instructors in action. Inspiration comes from looking at the best possible outcome of the task at hand, personified through an external source.

Observational exercise: Think of a task that you've been putting off. Write that task in the middle of a piece of paper and place a circle around it. In the next few hours, or even few days, observe people who personify the perfect manifestation of that task, or better yet, who personify someone who has achieved performing that task and is reaping the benefits of it. Keep adding inspirations to your chart until you take the first step into action.

2. FREEDOM FROM PAIN THROUGH LETTING GO OF EXPECTATIONS

Pow! pow! pow! Yes, I'm hitting you with another big one. And I left this one for last because when you achieve this freedom, the first two are going to be a cakewalk! I know, this sounds very Buddhist... because it is a modernized view from the Four Noble Truths. In the process of dreaming and carving out our goals and outcomes for ourselves, we often paint pictures of what we want. Oftentimes, we become attached to that specific picture, instead of the feelings those pictures evoke within us. When what we have doesn't match the exact picture that we have created, we feel frustrated, dissatisfied, angry or disappointed. I've got two words for us, my friends: LET GO. In doing so, we'll realize that we're closer to peaceful happiness than we've ever imagined.

NLP Exercise: Find a comfortable space and visualize a picture in your mind of something you want most in your life. See it in great detail. Take it in, noticing the feelings it brings to your heart: love, joy, excitement, power, peace, security. Close your eyes and focus now on those feelings while slowly allowing the picture in your mind to slowly melt away, leaving you with only its energy in your heart. Become familiar with those feelings, the emotions that come up when you think about what you want, so that you will recognize it when it appears in your life, even if it looks different fromt he picture you've painted in your mind.

THE UNIVERSAL DANCE PROJECT

Miss me?

Well your wait is over, for this newsletter is the start of the series of epiphanies from an experiment I call “The Universal Dance Project.” I attended a four-day gathering called Lightning in a Bottle, or LIB for short, on Memorial Day weekend. I don’t even know how to give it justice through my description, but my best effort is this: imagine that the fullest expression of creativity, spirituality, love and humor got together and had a baby. Well LIB was that experience.

The aspect of LIB that I noticed first was the mode of dress. Most people had garbs of different luxurious fabrics, accessories, makeup, headdresses, themes, etc. Someone described it as a "Bohemian Circus," and yet to create one blanket name doesn't somehow fit. After all, a pack of Samurais and a gorgeous woman dressed as a hawk aren't your normal "circus" folk, are they? So I started to wonder: is everyone really putting on an authentic expression of themselves, or are they conforming to the mode of dress dictated by the event?

The answer came from an angel, aptly named Puck, dressed in what I would describe as a "feathered-hippie-raving-artist" garb. I asked him the same exact question and he handed me a hawk feather. He said, "It's both. There is an evolution to your costume. At one point, you start out by perhaps imitating a look that you liked, only you give it your own little twist. Then another person looks at your style, takes it, and puts their own creativity into it. Soon enough, you'll have costumes that are made in the same energy, but appear differently." I started feeling the light of clarity coming in. " But then you have people who have very distinct ideas of their expression that may be different from anybody else's. Then you'll see some of their ideas being merged into the collective energy the next year. Any way you look at it, they're just dancing."

Whoa. He had me at "Collective Energy." Then I got lost again at "Dancing." He must have noticed my look of bewilderment, because he went on. "Imagine if you were about to dance with the Universe. Yes, ALL OF CREATION AND CONSCIOUSNESS. Now imagine that your dance must be expressed not with the movements of your body, but with the clothes you wear. What would that look like?"

Great. Now my head was officially in a tizzy. What he's essentially saying is this: it is not a crime to dress according to your environment, as long as you create that expression as your personal dance with the Universe.

It's now your turn to answer a question. If the way you live was your dance with the Universe, what would that expression look like?

Sunday, May 9 , 2010

DETAILS ARE SO LAST WEEK...

“Irene here reporting live from what looks like the cell.  Yes, folks, I’m talking about THE cell, that thing that makes up each and every one of us.  I’m here to experience what is known as Protein Biosynthesis, the process by which proteins essential to our metabolic functions are made… and… oh my gosh… what is happening?  Folks, it’s the DNA!  It’s being pulled apart! (*AAARGGHHH! screams the DNA*)  It’s this character, the RNA polymerase, it’s zipping through the insides of the DNA… what?... it’s COPYING the information?!?  What kind of creature is that?  Catch him!  Before he escapes through the nuclear pore!” (And scene.)

“She’s gone off her rocker!” you might exclaim.  Nope, just looking at things from a microscopic level.  You see, in the world of minute details, the body’s activities can be construed as a violent series of ripping apart, splicing together, living and dying.  But if you look at your body as a whole, through the general scope of a mirror, you see you, a peaceful, breathing, laughing, crying, eating work of divine art.  So take that same principle into your daily lives.  When your every moment is involved in minutiae, life becomes overwhelming.  Why is that?  Because most unresourceful emotions tend to live in the details; yes, fear, anger, sadness all reside there.

So take your focus away from details from time to time:  your neighbor is playing music (not country music, the one genre you’re not fond of), your friend is wearing clothes (not concerned with whether her patterns are clashing), that person is doing his job (no matter what it is).  Not only will you find yourself judging others less, you’d probably also accept yourself even more.

Monday, April 19, 2010

THE HARMONY FACTOR

A recent article in the New York Times caught my eye a few days ago. It was entitled "Is Marriage Good for your Health?" It was interesting to me in a lot of ways: a.) because I've always been told that married people were healthier than unmarried ones, b.) because Psychoneuroimmunology is a topic in which Kai has expressed interest, and c.) becuase any article that deals with relationships, emotion and both their effects on physical health always piques my interest. Click here for a link to the article.

If you don’t want to read the whole article, here’s a summary: in a study conducted of married couples, it was found that each person’s health is directly related to the level of marital harmony.  So that means that the more marital discord there was, the higher the toll on the immune system.  I know… you are probably calling me names like “Irene, Seer of the Obvious!”  I mean, there are countless of studies that have been done showing that stress has a negative effect on the immune system (that’s why we PRACTICE QIGONG!).  But what I found newsletter worthy was that, compared to the other stresses in our lives, the negative effects of the emotional trauma brought about by disharmony with your spouse is much stronger!  Egads!

I’m going to take a professional leap here, and add that any discord with ANYONE from whom you are expecting love and support – family, friends, dog – is probably not good for your immune system, either.  Now, to all my married readers, I’m not at all suggesting the “D” word (it rhymes with “Discourse”); Far from it!  What I’m really suggesting is this: finding a cooperative resolution to our conflicts will not only save our relationships, it could save our lives!

Here’s the first step:  FORGIVENESS.  Yes, you heard me.  And yes, even when they don’t apologize.  It’s the only way to really clear out any harmful sentiments that can wreak havoc to your immune system in the future.  To help you all out, I’ve modified an NLP tool so we can use it in our daily lives.  Click here for the “Forgiveness Exercise” that you can do at home.  Now, if the words “Hell” and “No” ever come into mind upon this suggestion of mine, then you may want to call to schedule an NLP appointment; because it’s when we resist giving forgiveness that we need it the most.

Monday, March 29 , 2010

UNIVERSAL VIBRATIONS

A few weeks ago, I was introduced to a number of local bands via an event for the Matt Wadleigh Foundation. It was a beautiful event, centered on Love with the energy of Joy. I have since gone to see those bands individually and enjoyed more of their music. One particular evening has stayed in my memory, though. No, it isn't because I chose not to have an alcoholic beverage or two, and instead opted for Chai Tea. It was because for the first time since I started listening to live music, I realized that there is a cellular connection between my body and the music.

We all are just products of vibrations: from the macro vibration of our ogans churning life within us to the micro vibration of the tiny atoms that make up our matter. Music is also just the vibration of particular sounds amplified by the movement of specific parts of instruments. So when we subject ourselves to any sound, that sound, that vibration of course merges with the vibration which is us, our matter in its simplest form.

So in my seat at Lestat's I listened. And I listened with my whole being. And the message of the music was so heartfelt that it connected with me on a cellular level, so much so that when I heard music that was beautiful and yet unconnected to my current consciousness, the repulsion caused by my whole body was just as powerful as the attraction. So why, you ask, is this worth sharing? Because as you all continue on your path of self-realization, you will find yourself in touch with your being's true vibration. And I just hope that my humble newsletter can come as a friendly reminder to align yourself with sounds (music, spoken word, ambient noise, etc.) that not only align but even raise your Universal Consciousness.

So that's my message to the two of you still reading this newsletter. Sometimes we misunderstand each other even when we are speaking the same words of the same language. But when you communicate with the feelings of your heart, even in silence, your message will be heard more clearly, it's impact felt deeper into the soul.

THE UNIVERSE CALLS AND OTHER VOICES IN MY HEAD

What could seeing the star mean? Well, when you are operating close to your higher purpose, the Universe sends you a message. So I saw this star in the horizon as a neon sign that says "Your life is facing the right direction. Keep going." And so I am, and I hope that my heart remains open enough to hear the Universal language as it speaks to me in nature, in music and in love.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

LOOK, BUT DON'T TOUCH!

Driving home from teaching Qigong in Encinitas, I was surprised and captivated by the moon. Not quite full anymore, I was still astounded by the way it largely loomed in the horizon. My first instinct? To pull over, take out my camera, and capture the image so I can keep it for longer than that moment. As I was getting ready to do just that, The Beatles spoke to me (the band, not the insects): "Let it be," they said. So I took another look at the moon and understood - sometimes moments are not meant to be captured but just appreciated for their presence.

"Admiration without possession" is this week's epiphany. My task: to live every day allowing everything and everyone around me to become beautiful exhibits in this grand museum of life; and hopefully acquire nothing else except gratitude and richness in my soul.

A QUESTION FOR YOU: Is there anything in your life that you admire and love, yet not possess? Ever entertain the idea that the appreciation is the prize?

We can't really help it, we were all born into a world that is primarily in the Yang/creative energy. This isn't all bad. For one thing, the technology bringing you this newsletter is a part of this creation. What we need is balance: to be as connected to our Yin/receptive energy as we are to our Yang/creative energy. So how do we do this? Well the Universe gave us the perfect ally: the Moon. Lunar energy is brimming with Yin energy and it's all there for us to absorb into our consciousness. At moonrise, practice meditation, pray, journal or do whatever it is that connects you with your inner self. This will cultivate your Yin, receiving and moving the energy into your unconscious self.

This Sunday, February 28th, we have a unique opportunity: the moon becomes full at 8:38am. At 3:00pm, we will gather together to harness the energy of our breath, use it to achieve a state of wellness and create within ourselves a deep meditation in the venue of the Full Moon. At 6:12pm, the moon rises, so you're more than welcome to walk to the bay with me and bask in nature's yin. Click on the flier to register.

DIARY OF A SOFT-BOILED FLUNKIE

Saturday, February 5th: Visit Kai in Santa Cruz. He advises me on diet, suggesting incorporating soft-boiled eggs to strengthen my kidney yin.

Monday, February 8th: Go to Trader Joe's to buy a dozen organic eggs. Hurry home and boiled my first pair of eggs. A watched pot indeed never boils. Decided to unpack while waiting for water to boil. Five minutes later, I returned and eagerly rescued my eggs from their boiling cauldron. Yolk is hard. Dang it! Pondered boiling two more eggs, but thought consuming four eggs might be way too extreme.

Tuesday, February 9th: Took the whole day to console and convince myself by repeating mantra: "I am not an abject failure. I can be one with the egg."

Wednesday, February 10th: Decided to give it another try. This time, I watched the pot, considering it part of my meditative practice. At the first sign of boiling, I took out the eggs. Did a congratulatory dance. Sat down only to discover that both eggs are undercooked. Ate them anyway (NOT RECOMMENDED!), spent the night repeating the mantra: "I don't have salmonella. I don't have salmonella."

Thursday, February 11th: Woke up grateful for not having violent fits of nausea. Considered going vegan. Decided to purposely make hard-boiled egg to complement my salad for lunch, repeating the mantra: "I am at peace with the egg."

Friday, February 12th: Over-cooked the eggs again! This time, I decided to do the dishes in close proximity to the stove. I guess I had more dishes than I anticipated. Threw fists in the air while yelling "Suck this Mr. Egg!" I finally realized the real art and beauty of egging a car during Halloween.

Saturday, February 13th: Kai comes to visit after spending a day camping with his sister Jill. I invoke my warrior to protect my lover and succeeded in not projecting my feelings of egg-inadequacy. Went to a Tantric Yoga workshop in OB and forgot all about the eggs.

Sunday, February 14th: Kai saw clients all day. Had lunch with Mukunda at the parking lot behind the clinic. My soured relationship with eggs finally subsides.

Monday, February 15th: In celebration of President's Day, I had some fried eggs. Yolk was runny. :-)

Tuesday, February 16th: Decided to incorporate some strategy to my soft-boiled egg production. Set timer on my Palm Pre. Three minutes after initial brisk boil. Nervously took out eggs. Cracked the surface. PERFECT! The whites firm, the yolk bright orange and soft. Repeated congratulatory dance.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

I GOT YOUR NOSE!

I have a challenge for all of you. I want you to look down at your hands. Now look at your thighs; or even your shoulder. Easy right? Now look at your nose. Aha. How about your ears? And now your eyes. I see. Found it a little challenging? All of us do. Now take a mirror and look at the last three parts again. Easier this time, right?

Much like your nose, ears or eyes, there are parts of your emotional self that are hard to see on your own. You either need someone to make a mirror and hold it up for you, or to describe to you what those parts look like from their perspective. These parts can be those we don't really want to see: the parts that judge, that parts that have trust issues, the parts that are materialistic, etc. Or they can be parts that we cannot recognize within ourselves: our inner genius, the part that empathizes and loves deeply, our true beauty.

Your next mission should you choose to accept it is this: pay close attention to the parts of you reflected through other people or parts of you revealed directly by conversations with friends and loved ones. Examine these parts in the space of belief that everyone around you has your best interest at heart. You can then choose to act: keep and accept that part of yourself or change and accept yourself without that part. And maybe, just maybe, I'll give you your nose back.

Sunday, January 31 , 2010

BHA: And we're back with the King, the Water Element

WE: Please, the "King" label just relates to the leadership qualities that is inherent in all of us.

BHA: Can you elaborate on these leadership qualities?

WE: Well let's take a look at my relationship with Fire. I control it and put it in balance, but I also allow myself to be stimulated by it. More importantly, I am able to just adapt to it: when I am in the solid form, I just melt into liquid. When I am in the liquid form, I just steam up into gas. And when the cold gas meets the warmth, I just go back to liquid again. So I believe that it is in maintaining my core quality while adapting to changing circumstances that make me a great leader.

BHA: Yes, I've definitely heard that you are very changeable. Isn't that a disadvantage?

WE: I don't see it as that at all! I have a primary form that people associate me with, but I can also embrace other paths or forms. When life places a huge boulder that blocks my path, I just go around it; so I automatically just look for an opening from which to flow. Oh, and extreme temperatures? No problem! I'm just as happy being liquid as I am being solid or gas. But my favorite form is one not generally recognized by most people: potential energy. When I get absorbed by trees, I am converted into potential energy in the form of oxygen to be released or nutritious fruits and vegetables to be consumed. Then I'm really into the circle of life!

BHA: Wow, didn't even realize that! Well we've certainly learned a lot from you in these past two interviews. When do we expect you to grace our presence and make an appearance in our newsletter again?

WE: You really should call upon me when you're feeling challenged by your life circumstances. I'm the part of you that finds the flow, even in the most difficult situations. I'm the part of you that realizes your personal power, so you can also call on me when you're feeling any fear at all. Oh, and water is also the element of hearing. So if you want to be a better listener, stick with me, kid.

BHA: I sure will, your highness. If you wish to practice calling upon your WATER ELEMENT, join us for Qigong on Mondays from 6:45 - 8:15pm and click here for a WATER ELEMENT meditation.

BREATH EMPOWERMENT THIS WEEK!

Monday, January 25th 6:45 - 8:15pm
Breakthrough Healing Arts - click here to register
4330 Cass Street, San Diego CA 92109

Tuesday, January 26th 7:30 - 8:30pm
Nautilus Holistic Health - click here to register
960 2nd Street, Suite 103, Encinitas CA 92024

Class is only $20, registration strongly recommended

Monday, January 18, 2010

Someone I love very dearly called me one day a couple of months ago, distraught. "Irene, I left my bag with my computer and all my important documents somewhere, but I can't seem to recall where. Will you help me track it down?" He was about an hour away from a flight out of town and was obviously stressed out about the situation. My immediate reaction was anger: "How can you lose your bag, with all of your important possessions and not know where you left it?!?!" I didn't express myself though because I was able to step back and recognize that this reaction just didn't make any sense! I mean, it's not like he lost MY bag!

So at this point, I invoked the goddess of "walk your talk" and decided to access my knowledge of the archetypes to guide me. We were going over the relationship of the Warrior and the Lover so I decided to check in with these parts of myself. Well my warrior was definitely ready for battle, in full regalia of verbal warfare and energetic bombs, ready to protect the boundaries of my emotions. My lover, however, was there somewhere in the dark recesses of my unconscious, cowering in fear for the consequences of my expression. At that moment, I realized my warrior needed to protect my lover more than anything else! Had I spoken based on my initial emotion, I would have hurt the part of me that loves this person.

So my warrior reached out a hand to my lover and said: "Don't worry sister, I got your back!" My lover, fully liberated from all fear, then asked the question: "What does the person I love need at this moment?" (Oh, that's just so typical of someone loving, isn't it?) The answers were comfort, compassion and understanding. And with my warrior's full support, I was able to communicate with the guidance of these emotions rather than the anger I initially felt. And why did I feel anger? Because in the moment of discovery, I felt powerless to change the situation of the one I love. But my warrior did eventually regain that power, not by expressing anger but by protecting the expression of love.

PS We got the bag back to its rightful owner, safe and sound, thanks to the manager of Rubio's who called us the next day and told us that the bag and its valuable contents were in his safekeeping.